The hardest place in the world to be is on the Potter's wheel, especially when you know you're there. You see, the potter's wheel is used to shape and mold clay, but spiritually the Potter's wheel is the hand of God as He shapes and molds your life for His purposes.
Two kinds of people go onto the Potter's wheel: Those who know they're on the wheel and those who don't. Some people may argue that being on the Potter's wheel when you don't know it is the most difficult. In this instance, there's so much chaos going on around you and you feel completely out of control. But at the end of the day you come out of the situation with a lesson learned and a better person. I When you're in this situation, you can cry out to God for help or even blame others.
However, when you know that God has put you on the Potter's wheel to rid self-perpetuated mess from your life, the true hurt enters. There's no one to blame but you. You try to get on your knees and pray, but God interrupts you. He just keeps saying, "You know what you need to do to fix this."
You do know and you cry out, "Yes, but if you just fix my situation, I promise to fix me," when you genuinely know that if God fixes the drama before you fix your crap, you will remain in your crap and eventually the drama will return. It's like God giving someone who doesn't know how to manage their finances a million dollars. They didn't know what to do with $100 so eventually they're going to be broke again because they're going to blow the million they just got.
That's where I am, tonight (initially wrote around 5:30 on 5/30/2008). I just go on my knees to pray about my situation, and all I could say is, "I know, God. Just help me fix it so I can be done…forever!!!"
I don't trust myself to fix my situation, so even though I'm working toward it, I'm relying totally on God's strength. And I pray He keeps meeting my needs in the mean time, while keeping me from going in the red since the curse has been broken J. I also pray that He recognizes my small progress and rewards me for it, while I continue to pray for His strength and guidance to let go of the rest of this mess. And I will give Him all the glory, honor, and praise.
I love YOU, and thanks for the revelation!!!
